Trundling along through life

23/12/2021 - Drilling

Redid half of the screw placements for the puzzles. Looks much better.

22/12/2021 - Ill

Day whatever of still not feeling right. LFT's say no covid but have felt like crap for several days now. No fun.

10/12/2021 - Russell Brand is a cunt

I've thought for many years that this over-inflated egotistical shallow narcissist of a fucking windbag was a genuine cunt and if you need more proof, here you are - Russell - The Cunt - Brand

10/12/2021 - Empty

a 'nothing' day. Even after a bottle of wine nothing is really happening. I think I wore myself out yesterday.
Test not yet done
Wondering how to repurpose and revitalise a domain that could be useful for the Community. It could also be a dumpster fire.
I really should have a shower

9/12/2021 - GSD

Productive day. Got Shit Done

8/12/2021 - A health test

Got a text from my doctor's practice saying to expect a package from a certain company
It arrived, and asks me for a urine sample as my doctor believes I am at risk of kidney disease.
It would have been nice to have known about this possibility earlier.

7/12/2021 - Christmas tree

A lovely Big Issue seller told me earlier that she has advised her kids (6!) that she needs to see if she gets enough customers to be able to buy a Christmas tree.
I bought a copy of the Big Issue from her for way more than I do usually and she now has enough money for a tree.
Hopefully some kids will be smiling later.

6/12/2021 - Bookshelves

Turns out that laying the pine bookshelf on it's side was a good idea

5/12/2021 - Doppelganger

Jeddah F1 starting at 1730 so around 1600 went to the pub with the dogs for a beer.
Sitting at the bar with the hounds and a guy walks past (on his way to the Gents). Stops and says that I look exactly like his dad. Like freaky identical. I reply that I'd read we all have a double but he was "Hey, this is freaky"
So maybe there are two identical guys who are no oil paintings!

4/12/2021 - Dude!

In the pub, a lady stops to stroke my two dogs. I compliment her on the hand- knitted cardigan she is wearing. She responds by pointing at my cardigan saying she knows what it means. I show a tattoo on my hand which she recognises.
Then along with her partner we had a good chat about buddhism, taoism and THE DUDE.

3/12/2021 - Rolling?

For the first time I can recall in 5+ years I put the toilet roll into the holder/roller thing properly.
That is ... wow
Maybe this is the start of me getting organised!

2/12/2021 - Counselling

Is it working? I don't know, but I'm fairly sure it will, in the end, be part of the solution.
At any rate it's the only time anyone tells me that I am an okay person. Strange thing to value I suppose but my need for validation is real. It keeps me together.
She has established that a lot of my being like I am is maternal related. Had never considered that the bearer of me could be a narcissist but it sort of fits from what little I know. That plus the sexual abuse plus the later continual putting down of me has made me what I am.
I would say I can deal with that but I do not think that is the correct thing to say. Fact is what is done is done, the past is the past and nothing I can do now can affect that. All I can affect is what happens here. Now. Today. And that is where the problem lies.

I have no life events to look forward to. I have no-one to share daily life with. I have no-one I would consider a friend. I have no real idea of who I am.
So the question is - will this counselling let me find that out?

1/12/2021 - Site created

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